Troy
You see this is the molar and they had to put this cap on it, the cavity was just huge they said.  So what do you think, Matt?  Come ooon, I'm drunk.

Aaron Stone
"No Matt, I have shown you a thousand times, this is how you properly suck a dick.  Quit fucking this up.  Now go practice."

Dan
"I will pay you 1 million dollars for one night alone with Gino," Matt proclaimed.  Astonished by the offer, Aimie replied, "I'd take a bullet in the head before I'd let anyone else get their hands on that sweet, sweet hunk of Italian lust."  Matt then thought to himself, "In due time Aimie, in due time."

Rice
Matt: Aimie, you've got really nice teeth, come on!
Aimie: No, Matt! I have fucking tooth decay and plaque! I don't know what the hell to do different! I brush and floss like at least once a day! Matt: How about you put my fat dick in your mouth and suck on it?

Louie
Aimie: See?  I love the cock.  I do, I love it.
Matt: Jackpot.

Dan Lundquist
Announcer: "This just into the newsroom, Matt Kipp gets turned down again!"
Announcer (turns): "What a second.. Are you sure that's not a typo? Shouldn't it be Jon?"
Announcer (looks back): "Well dress me up and call me Suzy, it is Matt.."

Worst caption: Ronny
Go on a date with you?  I'd rather kill myself.

Ronny, that wasn't creative and it was just plain mean.  Any picture of a girl with an open mouth is an easy target for a dick joke and you managed to fuck it up.

Tim
"Damn those refs were right, it doesn't matter who you are, Miller Lite is both great tasting and less filling."  Hey, Tim, that's pretty funny, I love how you played in the whole Miller/Budweiser commercial thing in there.  Clever!  But, if you don't mind some constructive criticism, I think this would have been better if you could have incorporated something about the nun and comic book character. I mean for goodness sakes, nuns don't drink... And that action hero?!  Instant comedy with him drinking a beer.  Not too impressed.  Good effort, Timothy, but not good enough. (This whole thing was written by Tim.)

Dan
Only a good little Mormon girl would attend the wake of Spiderman, crush a beer with his nemesis Venom, and still remember to bring her school books for studying prior to the occasion.  You have to hand to those Mormons, they really know how to raise a respectable girl.

Rice
Spider Man was nowhere to be found as his three arch enemies teamed up for the first time: Venom, beer, and Catholicism.

Worst caption: No one?

Rice's
Jon: This is the brand new GoldenBrew 007 mug that I recently purchased with a 30% coupon that I found on Slickdeals.net.  As you can see right here this is a 512MB detachment that stores underneath here.  And if you look really closely at the handle, you'll see a laser pointer.  Now personally, I like to pretend it's a light saber and fight myself in the mirror.
Dillon: Is that contact solution stored in the handle, so that you can put your contacts in there at night?
Jon: Yes, Dillon, it is.
...Little did Sandra know, the mug was also equipped with a "RHD" or a "Roofie Hypnosis Device" and soon she would encounter her first threesome and never be the wiser...

Jon
"... And this is where babies come from..."  She didn't buy it.

Aaron Stone
No seriously, look right there...Oh man, that is Tom's tooth!

James Zellen
Yes, ladies and gentleman, it's the greatest invention ever! It does
everything, just drink! It's called beer.

Lou Dizzle for Shizzle Bizzle Its The Snoop D O double Gizzle
Jon: Its a cup
Mike: i never seen antying like it.
Jon: istr whats most sivilized people use
Mike: i skip the whole glassd things and go sraight for the pictre 
Random hoe: whos gonna have sex with me?

Louie, I don't edit Ish's or your captions because I think they are much better in their original form.

Worst caption: Dave & Wryl (?!)
Dave
I'm really gonna have to disagree with you Stan, the glass is obviously half full.

Dave, I don't know who you are, but I'm sure Louie is glad you've arrived.

Wryl
Wow! Mike's pee really DOES look like beer!

Who names their kid "Wryl"?  I mean, honestly...

Rice
"Gee, Scoob, no I haven't seen the pirate ghost that eats your hair! Why did Velma just say 'Jinkies?'"

Worst caption: Louie
Weird Al and Ryan Seacrest secretly are gay lovers as seen in the picture.

Glad to have you back to normal, Louie.  Your shitty captions were missed.

Evan
What the hell, Gino, I thought you were supposed to be Jon for
Halloween?  Wait, from the right you actually do look like him, nice work.  But tell Jason to get the fuck out of the background in every picture, it's really gay.

Rice
Now you would think the most disgusting thing in this picture would be the fat pink guy's gut hanging out from underneath his tank top.  Or possibly even think the most disgusting thing is the nerd with the body paint and no shirt.  However, I beg to differ.  The fact that the pink-o fatty has a stain on his shorts that resembles the body paint from the nerd behind him leads me to believe that the shirtless nerd was humping the pink hungry hippo prior to the tailgate.  And personally, in this current state of the nation, I just don't think there's room for another set of gay sinners in this country.  The next thing you know they're gonna want to vote or something.  Thank goodness Bush won!

Tim
I love you, Dad.

Rice
Pink used to be my favorite color...

Worst caption: ???
Did you travel through time to get this picture of Britney Spears looking for her next husband in 2008?

Worst caption: Nobody

Tom
Staring contest, go!  You win... you always do.  That's why I come up here, NAAAture!  HEE, HEE.  I Suck!!!

Evan
Dillon: Oh yeah, well the human head weighs 8lbs, beat that!
Troy: Oh yeah, well two plus two equals four.
Dillon: Damn, you win again.

Tim
Dillon: Hey, Troy, why do they call it a pony keg?
Troy: Call what pony keg?
Dillon: I don't know, but I just shit in a beer bottle.
Troy: I'm drinking out of it right now.
Dillon: Yup.
Troy: Yup.

Worst caption: Daunt
The staring competition is the newest Special Olympic event.

Also submitted by Tim:
Evan: Hey Gino, what's your sign?
Gino: I'm a Capricorn?
Cheryl: HA! Just as I thought!
Gino: ?? What is it she thought??
Evan: Well me and my lady friend here were just going over our horoscopes this afternoon, when we came across hers.
Gino: Yeah...
Evan: Well my lady friend here just found out that a Cancer, which I am, and a Capricorn, which you are, have been in a secret relationship, without a Scorpio, her, knowing.
Gino: Damn those horoscopes! I swear we kept our relationship quiet, and out of the public eye.
Evan: I know... but Goddammit you gotta respect the horoscope for being correct!

Wow, Tim... Wow.

Dan
With his lovely trainer looking on with great encouragement, Gino continues his painstaking effort to prepare himself for the difficult times ahead of him.  All of us familiar to his situation refer to it as "being single".  Yes, he is working hard to strengthen his wrist.  It grows stronger by the day, and hopefully we will all be kept posted on his progress.

Gino
Gino: "EVAN, ONE MORE FUCKING ITALIAN JOKE OUT OF THESE MOTHERFUCKERS AND I'LL PUNCH MYSELF IN THE FACE, I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD!"
Cheryl: "DO IT, PUSSY!"

Ish
Evan: Hey, Gino, I bet my girlfriend can squeeze her teeth harder than you can squeeze your fist.
Gino: I doubt that. Go!

Rice
Squeeze all you want, fucko, it'll never feel like the real thing.

Evan
Hey, at least I'm finally not the one she's pissed at for nothing.

Jon
After watching the entire Star Wars Trilogy, Gino attempts to use The Force to open his hand... using only his mind... What?!?

Troy
I know if I squeeze my hand hard enough it will blow up and a hidden farm will show up cause look at my freakin' dorky ass plaid shirt... Seriously, who do you think you are, Al from Home Improvement (as the writer shakes his head)?

Aaron Stone
"Damn you, fist, even with being as greasy as I am, you still wont fit all the way up my ass!"

Worst caption: Ish (drunk, of course)
Why didn't anyone tell me i was supose to wear a white shirt at this party? AHHHHH!!!!

Gino: God this wacht makes me so mad I wish I could jsut punch it as hard as a could and by looking at my face i'm pretty mad ritght now!

GinO: this gil in the bowling green shirt makes me so mad I could pucnh myself in the face!!!
Exvan: I get that feeling too!

EvN:  Who's mader at teh door,?
Gino: I'm so mad I could make a fist and punch the door wwith a funny face!!!
Cheryl: I'll just make a fuinny face and not lok at teh door cause it disgusts me@!!!!

Cheryl: I'm so mad that you haven't updated the website in over a week.
Gino: I know I think I'm gonna punch myself in the face for being such a faggot.
Evan: Yeah do it!

Ish, you suck on so many levels, it's uncanny.  The retarded kid that lives down the hall from me knows that I update the site every Thursday.  What the hell is your major malfunction?

Somebody, but not Adam Stone
When Matt and Jason went to San Francisco to unify their love, they had to partake in the ritual of sharing the juices of three little boys before they could become official man-lovers.

Worst caption: Some kid named "Hot Action"
"Whoa, is that a hypodermic syringe?"

Ish showed this kid this picture and those are the words that spewed from his stupid mouth.  Granted, it's not really a caption, but it is extremely stupid.  On top of that, this kid introduced himself as "Hi, my name's Mike (or whatever his name was) a.k.a. 'Hot Action'."  Dude, are you serious?  Hot Action?  Is that your MC name?  Seriously, dude, you suck.

Rice
Gino: "Hey, bay bay!"
Jon (in Elvish): "A red sun rises, blood has been spilled this night."
Gino: "Listen, bay bay, I don't mind stickin' it somewhere with a little blood comin' out of it.  Won't be the first, won't be the last.  And, let's be honest... when I'm through, there may be a little more blood. I love blondes, sweetheart, and I'm gonna love you all over your purty face."

Gino: "Jon, seriously, we need to talk.  Have you registered to vote yet?"
Jon: "But, Gino, I don't like either of the options.  It's like choosing the lesser of two evils!"
Gino: "Jon, let me tell you a little something about a program called 'Choose or Lose.'  20 million loud, my friend.  Vote for something!"

Evan
Gino: "A little to the left, now back a bit, a little more left... nope, even in this light it's still the worst Halloween costume I've ever seen.  Sorry, fag."

Ish
Jon: "Yeah so pretty good costume, I love the mullet and drawn on facial hair, you really capture the white trash culture. But the thing I don't get is what's with the watch? You're suppose to be a white trash moron, and you got more bling on your wrist than Jay-Z. What's the deal?"
 Gino: "Jon you have cut out poster taped to your forehead for a costume."

Jon (sobbing, whiny voice): "Why won't anyone talk to me? I don't get it... "
Gino: "Probably 'cause that's the worst costume in the history of Halloween, Jon... And that's coming from a white trash idiot."

Jon (sobbing, whiny voice): "Why won't anyone talk to me? I don't get it."
Gino: "Probably 'cause of your huge face and neck."

Troy
How the fuck did your head get so big and shiny... Wait, how did I get so Guns N' Roses-like?"

Somebody
Gino: "Lets pretend I'm Aragorn so I can unsheathe this mullet cock upon you, then afterwards we can play Risk for blowjobs... I get Irkskurk!

Jason
"I ain't never made love to a elf before."

Matt
DORK'D!!!

Dan
Gino proclaimed with a burly, drunken redneck voice, "I've never made it with a man who had bigger shinier head than mine." "The Dueling Banjos" played somewhere off in the distance.

Louie
Gino: "You can't hide behind that for the rest of your life."
Jon: "Gino, why didn't you dress up? I see you got another cool tattoo."

Worst caption: Adam Stone
So then Gino says to the guy, "Hey, Legolas, what the fuck are you doing here?"